birthday time1

I'm officially 22 years old today. Off to Universal IOA for a day of fun and very un-florida like cold. But Cold and Theme parks are the magic word for Florida locals, it means the parks will be filled to the brim. But I'm going to have fun anyway.

Season of giving... yeah right

Christmas is the most exhausting time of year when you work retail. The reason for this? Because it doesn't matter how fast you move, or how many lines are open. There's not enough cashiers to meet the demands of the people, because eventually someone is going to go to break, another is going to lunch, and another is set to go home.
I was leaving for a break yesterday and a woman stopped me and demanded I get onto a register or she was going to tell my manager. I laughed. Probably not the smartest move, but I couldn't help myself.
Don't these people understand that I'm a human being too? That I'm not a robot made to work unending hours at a time, without complaint and without anger? If I had stayed on the register without the option to get something to eat, rest my feet a bit, and make sure my blood sugar was still good (more on that later) I'd most likely have passed out and that would've been just the perfect end to an already horrible day.

The holidays stress me out because on top of Christmas, it's also coming around to my birthday. I'm never a fan of my own birthday. I'll be 22 this year and all my birthday does is remind me that I'm still stuck in Retail hell, that I'm stilling living at home with my parents, and that I'm no closer to making my dreams come true than I was at this time last year. The only bonus I have this time is that I'm not working and I'm going over to the theme parks for my birthday. I'm thrilled about that, I haven't been to IOA since HHN 18, but we did next to nothing.

I'm trying to fight this blue mood that's been hanging over me. But it's becoming somewhat difficult to manage. If it keeps up much longer I will go back and see my doctor. I can't deal with depression on top of the stress at work. It just doesn't go well together. I either want to smoke or drink, and both of those are things I'm trying not to do.
One because smoking is bad for you (but damn it makes things seem less stressful) and two, drinking leads down a long road I'm not willing to walk!

I had some blood work done the other day. Something's off about it so I have to go have more done at the end of Jan. Hopefully it's nothing serious and it's just my body not reacting well to the BC I'm on right now for my genetic problem. (PCOS).
You know that movie, Repo? Sometimes I sing the songs from it and laugh because it is so true. There's nothing I can do to change the way my body ended up, there's no disease I can blame for this, only my own shot genetic code, programed into me from birth.
PCOS: Poly cystic ovarian syndrome, is a disorder that causes cysts on the ovaries, causes missed periods, and generally a lot of stomach and... uh, down there pain. It can also lean to infertility. Basically, without birth control I have maybe four periods a year, I'm in a lot of pain, and, later on, I may not be able to have children.

I always laugh to myself when people complain about their children. Don't they realize how blessed they are to know they have a child, that they don't ever have to worry about there coming a day when they finally sit down and admit to themselves that they will never hold a child in their arms that shares the same blood as them? I've accepted that I probably can't have children. I won't know for certain until I'm willing to try... but until then, I'm going to smile and try and be cheerful when I see people take their children for granted.

You're so lucky... why can't you see that!

Faded smiles

It doesn't seem to matter what I do anymore, someone is getting pissed off with me. I tried to explain to my CSM last night why I had to leave on time, and he completely blew me off. I don't know what to do anymore.
It seems like I should shut up and stop talking altogether, maybe then things will get better. I'm just sad lately, Christmas does that to me.
Excuse me while I go and wait for my next visit to hell.

Night on the town

I didn't go into this planning to go out and party. I planned to just hang out, maybe drink maybe not, but I never imagined getting as trashed as I did.
The bad thing is that I'm sober now. And I realize how badly I fucked up. I called in for tomorrow, only... I was drunk when I did it. God knows what Night shift things of that one!
The other thing is that I think my sister's about to seriously fuck up her life... and there's not a damn thing I can do to stop her. She's an adult but I wish I knew what to do!
Screw it. I'm going to bed, hopefully no puking...

Blowout

You know that happiness I had for the tattoo I got? It's gone. The tattoo looks like shit now because the artist was too damn heavy handed. I'm trying to find another artist to help me fix it, but I don't know what to do anymore ~_~ I'm horrified by how bad it is today.
If chopping my arm off was an option... I would be one armed.

Venting

I need to vent really bad right now so I'm going to say sorry in advance for the emo-fest you are about to read!

I don't understand why people think they can walk all over me! I loaned my sister 50 dollars for her tattoo (two weeks ago) with the promise that it would be repaid by the following Tuesday. She finally got her paycheck and is now giving me a bunch of bullcrap about not being able to pay me back right now because of bills.
HELLO! Why the fuck did she get a tattoo if she knew she would be unable to pay me back????

God damn me to hell for being a cold hearted bitch but I have to eat too! I paid for my own tattoo out of my own money, and damn me again for it (since I am not happy with the final results) but I don't have kids to worry about, I don't have a family relying on me for ends meet. I am me, myself, and I, and I am quite happy for it to remain this way for a very long time.

While I do one day want to be a mother, if I'm blessed enough for that to happen, I have no desire once so ever to be a young mother. I'm smart enough to know that at 21 years old I am too young, too self-centered, to ever make the right choices for a child. Hell, half the time I make the wrong choices for myself!

I'm trying to find the good in my life but it seems to have gone out the window once more. I'm sad tonight and I have absolutely no one to talk to about it. It seems like the moment I admit to being down and out people think I'm vying for attention or am being suicidal again. (Yes, again).
I'm not. I'm just freaking sad. THERE IS NO REASON I CANNOT BE SAD FOR FIVE GODDAMN MINUTES! I'm tired, just so freaking tired. I want to crawl into a little cave in the middle of nowhere for a year or two and get my head screwed back on straight.

With work and everything else going on in my life I feel like I'm in a room with the sides closing in on me. I need to breathe. I need five minutes of clean air to feel like myself again. But I can have that with the holidays. I can't have that when people are constantly poking and picking at me. I can't have that when my freaking tattoo looks like shit right now and I want to cut the sucker off my arm every time I look at the damn thing (I know it's not that bad, it's still healing and I might like it better when it's finished) but it doesn't change how it looks right now and how much crap I'm getting from people at work.
Excuse me while I go write or rather, re-write, my story. I need a break from normal people. I prefer my guys and girls to the people I live with. At least they get me :D

*Yawn*

Back to the daily grind of work. Hopefully it goes smoothly, but my tattoo is being a pain. The main problem is that it's located on my upper arm and the skin there pulls a lot when I move it too much ~_~ oh well, can't be helped.

Been done a thousand times but I love this design. I will be adding more tattoos to my arm after this heals. Next is probably going to be a Cheshire cat (Unraveling).

Tattoo choices

I made the choice to get a tattoo yesterday. Was it the best choice in the world, probably not, but I don't regret a thing. See, my opinion of Tattoos is that you're turning your body into a piece of artwork, and you're making it a home you find beautiful. We paint our houses and change the color of our hair, some get plastic surgery to try and find themselves or make something more likable.
For me, this tattoo is my way of making my body my home, truly my home. The tattoo is of a hand mirror with the glass cracked. The words on the mirror say 'We're all mad here' (Alice in Wonderland) backwards (you can only see it clearly by looking at it through a mirror lol). The idea behind it is that you're looking through the mirror from the wrong side (Wonderland).
Why did I choose an Alice in Wonderland tattoo? I have a silly but very personal reason. When I was younger I had a huge learning problem and could not for the life of me read a book. I found an old battered copy of Alice's adventures in Wonderland, and before I knew it I was reading that book.
It is also the theme of my first ever story. I wrote a short story about Alice going back to Wonderland all grown up. It was the first story I wrote from start to finish.
That is why I chose it. Alice is the first story that really made my imagination kick into overdrive and think 'what if' for the first time. Alice prompted me to try my hand at writing and I've never been happier than when I'm creating words from nothing.
I'm never going to regret this tattoo, I'm going to treasure it because it reminds me of who I am and what makes me happy in this life. No one else needs to understand the meaning, only me myself and I.
To everyone else, it's a cracked mirror with backwards words :D

My next one will be the Cheshire cat, continuing my Alice theme until this arm is finished.

Exhausted

Well, I'm mad about my shoulder hurting but the medicine my doctor gave me to help also causes drowsiness, I have mixed feelings about taking it ~_~

I also can't get a doctor's note until she knows exactly what is wrong so I'm basically screwed at Work and will have to continue to lift things at the register unless I ask customers not to put them on the belt. Maybe if I hang a sign it'll work? lmao

Anyway, I've had to call out twice this week because of the pain. I'm just not having a good week at all; not at all.

Chaotic nights

Hey guys, 
I had an amazing time over at Disney for their halloween party :D It was absolutely perfect, and a great way to spend my mini vacation from work.
I only wish my return to work was half as pleasant. It seems like from the get-go there has been nothing but total bullshit to wad through. 
Last night I was told to wait for a replacement. This Manager knows full well I have a second job I have to get up for in the morning; keep that in mind. Okay, fine, I'll wait. So he sends one cashier home, then another, and then sends the first 10 o'clock cashier coming in to an empty register. 
ten rolls around fully, still waiting. There are five cashiers standing around doing nothing. At five after I leave. 
I'm sorry but when you get up at 6 every single morning, enough is enough. So today, manager comes up and demands to know why I left. Because I finished my shift moron. He confronts me in front of customers; and doesn't give me a chance to explain myself. He walks off and leaves before I can explain, and then acts like I'm lying when I told him I waited until five after. He said he'd check with the cashier who took over my register. 
Fuck you, check what time I clocked out asshole. Ugh!
I might talk to my head manager about that tomorrow. 


On a funny note. I had a couple teenagers come through my line busy energy drinks. Okay, no biggie. One hands me a five and then the change. 
"I don't want the penny!" she says.
Okay, I go to get her four dollars out of the drawer, turn around... stupid has walked away, leaving me with four dollars :p
I stuck it back in the drawer and warned the next cashier about it. Girl didn't even take her slip so she has no way of proving she never got the change. Whatever, I told the next cashier she had money to work with if anyone came up short lmao. 

Sad memories and bad days

Well, I got written up at work for all the time off I took in the past (five days in six months) I kind of expected it but oh well; what can you do?

Anyway, was just thinking about my cats both the ones I have now and the ones that have passed.

Thunder: My first cat, given to me on my 2nd birthday by my parents. She was part of a litter of strays a neighbor found in his backyard. Was a terrible cat, not friendly and couldn't stand children. It wasn't until I was a teenager that I begun to actually like her as a cat. She was an in-door-out-door cat and as she grew older she'd started staying away for long periods of time.
We actually thought on one of those long absences that she'd finally died somewhere. But, all of a sudden she returned, very sick but alive. I bathed her and let her sleep with me in my bedroom. Two days later and she was extremely sick. I was sixteen years old when I had to take her to be put down because of how sick she was. I will never forget that pain. 


Nala: The Lioness of the cats we owned. She was a birthday gift for my sister's sweet sixteen, and from the get-go was a terrible cat. Extremely unfriendly and just a horrible monster. But, for all her faults, she loved the babies. She was a mama cat to my sisters' children, rushing over and insisting the adults take care of them right away (biting you if you didn't do it quick enough). Another in-door-out-door cat; but one that stayed very close to home.
She died earlier this year when a neighbor left car fluid out on his driveway and she drank it. I took her to the vet and after everything, trying to save her life, still had to put her down because her kidneys had fully failed and it would only be a matter of time and a slow and painful death if I didn't. 


Rogue: Rogue was originally supposed to be my sister's cat; but she backed out on adopting her shortly after visiting the shelter (money issues) so I took my remaining babysitting money and went to get her. It was painful because Thunder had only been dead about two months when I adopted this one and I wasn't sure if I wanted another cat. But she and I hit it off with her being my total baby. But since we've added more cats to the family she's grown distant from me and now mostly thinks of herself as my parents' cat. 


Aries: Aries was the first pet-store cat we bought, and I wouldn't buy another one if you paid me. He was bought by my sister (she has a thing for fuzzy black balls of fluff) He and Thunder matched. He matched her perfectly, almost to the point where I thought they might be related at some point in the past. My sister never got him fixed and let him roam around outside the house. Eventually when we brought a cat home from the shelter (who was supposed to be fixed) he fathered a litter of kittens with her before vanishing completely. He was either hit by a cat or picked up by someone. I like to believe he was picked up and given to a good home (Probably wishful thinking thought). 


Salem: Salem was a foster cat we took in while his F-mom was out of town. He and his sister stayed with us for two weeks and at the end of those two-weeks we decided to adopt him. He is one ugly looking cat, (hence the name: Salem from Sabrina the Teenage witch). He and Aries got along very well and we're the best of friends until Aries wandered off. Now he is our only male cat and is totally my dad's cat, will just lay in his lap all day if allowed. 


Kira: Kira actually began her life with my sister and her husband. They lived in a smallish apartment and the cat was their trail run on having a child-like thing to take care of. When my sister finally got pregnant and they decided to move to another apartment; they had to give her up because the new place didn't allow pets. I took her in and at the moment she is laying at my feet watching me type this. She is a typical fat cat, totally in love with her life and sweet as can be. I adore her!


Abby: Abby belongs to my nephew and was picked out at the shelter on her final day there. She was due to be put to sleep when they closed. We took her home and noticed some odd things about her, but were told that it was normal for a female cat to act like she was in heat. Turns out it wasn't normal and they had forgotten to fix her (basically they assumed no one would want her, so they never did it). She ended up having a litter of five kittens with Aries. Now she's been fixed and is a fat cat. 


Alice: Alice is my baby. She is the only kitten out of Abby's litter that I kept, and I kept her because when she was born she had medical problems. I paid for everything to be fixed, and the vet 'fixed' her for free. On the way home from the vet my mom told me I could keep her :) I'm looking at her now as she's playing with a pipe cleaner... she's a full black ball of fluff, and a good mix of her parents genes. 


Jack: Not a cat but the family dog. He is a Rat-terrier and an over-all good guy. Old by dog standards and set in his ways; but a good dog nonetheless. 

Ticket to crazy town

Omg... I just had the most random shift of my life. I'm at my register, it's slow as fuck and I'd take just about ANY customer at this point. The two that come into my line however... well, I've had them come through before and know what to expect (or I thought I did.)
They're Electric cart users. I have no problem with EC's but I've learned that the people who use them need a little more TLC from the cashiers. I help unload the cart if they need it, and try to be more cheerful toward them because usually they're older and probably having a lot of issues (A smile goes a long way)
These two however... I think they use the carts because whatever drugs they're using are so strong they'd fall over if they didn't. These two are serious druggies; every time I see them they're high or drunk... hell, maybe both at the same time.

Anyway, they're acting typical, slurring their words and making little to no sense. I'm trying to keep my cool and not yell at them when their bags pile up and they don't move their carts forward for me to load it. So, the wife runs off to the bathroom; that's when things get interesting.

The husband takes a stack of bills out of his pocket and counts it out. One... two... three... he begins swaying and all of a sudden slumps forward, face planting the belt.

Me: Oh! Uh... Help...
Cashier in front of me: Oh shit, is he dead?
Me: No... he's snoring...

The asshole fell ASLEEP at the register...

Shoot me... please...

Headaches are a bitch

I woke up with a headache, figured I'd be fine after I got a little more sleep; the she devil (my cat) refused to allow me anymore; she wanted to play all morning long... bugger all).
So, I'm sitting here preparing (in my own way of course) for my shift at WM. In a few minutes I'll go take some medicine to chase the headache away, I'm going to buy a four hour energy to see me through my shift, and I'm going to do my best to keep a cheerful outlook on my life thus far!

Tomorrow I have to buy a new G-test meter, mine finally copped out on me :( that, plus tablets, plus strips... eeek, so much money.

I'm done with this job. I can't work with these people any longer.

Off I go again

Ready for work, or as ready as I ever am. Today is an easy shift, tomorrow is the bitch slap to the face shift of 9 hours. I'll survive but seriously not looking forward to it. Anyway, I'm hoping against hope that they'll let us wear our 9/11 shirts tomorrow but I doubt it. If not I'll write something on my hand lol, I've done it before and no one but the customers has noticed it.

Anyway, today is a make up and hair style day for me. Still getting over this cold so I'm not feeling my best. I decided that just because a feel like shit there's no reason I should look it a well. So, I think I look pretty darn nice; though I know my co-workers are going to start up with the "Who is he" comments again.
Why does a girl have to have a guy in her life to look nice??? I've never understood that lol.

Well, I'm bored so I might leave early and look at... dun dun dun... swimsuits. Vacation is next friday and I need a bathing suit to wear. I'll either buy one or borrow one from my sister. Either way I have to have one and I better stop bitching about it before it is too late.

Asthma and a cold

It really doesn't mix, but the funny thing is is that I never have a problem with it unless I'm already sick; in which case it kicks my ass and sends me home crying. I had to leave work because I have an attack (caused by a customer's horrid smell, bathed in body spray or some shit) and today I got an attack while just walking with my friend.
See, I don't have a rescue H because I don't need one often. I made it home and finally did a treatment on my Nebulizar (I spelled that wrong but am too lazy to look up proper spelling). I didn't realize how hard it was to breathe until I could breathe normal again.

Anyway, just thought I would post so you know I'm still alive and kicking. Just posted both HHE stories on Deviantart if you wanna check them out there. Or they're on Fanfiction.net as well. Either site :)

Eeek

Been a while since I posted on here. Been busy with real life!
Had an interview at Winn-Dixie on Monday; I don't know if I'll get a call back from them or not. sitting here listening to the sky talk *thunder and lightning* and slowly getting myself dressed for work. I'm not looking forward to the run through the rain!
Don't know what the Hurricane is going to do but I still have to show up at work either way. FML >_<

Anyway, talking to my friend in NY about the Earthquake over there. Sucks major bull balls, anyway. Gotta make my hair not look like I rolled out of bed. I'll write more later! Peace!

UGH

I feel absolutely exhausted right now. Just woke up after a night of tossing and turning; and all I want to do is curl myself back up under the blanket and forever I have to work 8 hours today. But, Tuesdays aren't usually bad, hopefully it's a steady pace and I'll be out of there on time tonight
Last hour shift I ended up staying a half an hour to deal with a problem filled WIC check.

Moves like jagger

I'm sitting here in boy-short underwear and a white tank... and I feel completely comfortable in my own skin. This time last year I would have been wearing a baggy sweater and sweat-pants; even though I'm completely alone. It's amazing what time does to a person.
The fact is, I've learned that I AM a beautiful person even if I'm not model thin (or am way overweight) I've been asked out at work (sadly I turned him down due to the fact that I don't date co-workers) and my life is okay. It's nowhere near perfect but it's okay and I'm doing alright.
I get down, I get blue but there are times when I'm happy too. I'm okay.
For the first time in my life I can look at myself in the mirror and say "We're okay. Not perfect, but okay." and to everyone who tells me otherwise, who says I'm disgusting and unlovable... FUCK YOU! I've spent too many years believing that crap only to open my eyes and see it isn't so. I can and will be loved. I can make my life into something; the future isn't as bleak as you led me to believe. So in the end, I'm going forward with my life and you'll be stuck feeling like a sad little person.

I never understand why people get off on the hurt of others. But I'm done being hurt.

Exhausted

Well, I had the root canal done and my jaw swelled up to the point I couldn't talk... guess what I did the following day? I called out of work...
Or, in the opinion of my mngt, I ended the entire world and am a huge fuckface (that's how he made me feel on the phone though; after making me repeat myself a thousand times even after I explained it was hard to talk right now) threatened to write me up when I came in for my following shift.

Tonight should be fun, I need to go put in my time off requests. Jesus there are a lot of then. I made an attempt to change me times and got the run around from mngt with my fourm being lost somewhere. So, I'm just going to put the requests in and if Amy (my front end manager <3) asks about it I'll explain what happened with the time change request. I'm not going to keep filling out the damn fourm if the manager I need to sign it is going to lose it or not be there at the same time as myself. It's fucking stupid. I need to time off for doctor/dentist visit because I've been so sick lately (blood sugar issues, on top of my mouth problems) and I'm going out of town for a full weekend! WOOT!

I wish I could add a note to the requests so she would know WHY I need the time off. I feel sort of bad about it though. It's about a full week when it's all stuck together. Doctors apt, baby shower for my sis, vacation with my family, birth of my niece :)

Stick a fork in me I'm almost done

Well, almost long working section (I can't call it a work week because it gets split up so randomly) has drawn to a close. I have two days off starting tomorrow but I'm not REALLY going to enjoy them. I'm finishing the cleaning in my bedroom tomorrow (watching clothes and hopefully looking into getting a new bookshelf. I have over 200 books when I counted them. They are piled everywhere right now until I get a chance to go through them all!
I got the Nook on my phone. It's alright, I did it because I got so tired of carrying books around in my work bag for nights like tonight where I'm waiting two hours for my ride home (God I need to learn how to drive!)
Anyway, the second day off is not going to be fun because I'm having a root canal and tooth rebuilding (FTW is that anyway) done; and waiting for them to make a crown for my tooth.
The total out of pocket cost is 391 :( FML. Hopefully I only have to pay for some of it this week and the rest when I go in and get the crown put on.

I'm also pissed because I got sick at work the other day and had to leave early. I feel like such a brat when I do that but I could not get my blood sugars to level out and was getting really dizzy. When you're having to haul things across the register, making stupid ass mistakes (I freaking ran a check as cash) and dropping things left and right because your fingers have swollen up and are unable to bend... it's time to go home.
I might stay and work an extra half hour to night (even my shift to eight hours) if they let me; just to make up some of the time difference.

FML

Well, today's apt with the dentist went about as well as I expected give that the last time I went was 3yrs ago and he was an idiot! Well, I need 3 crowns (shoot me, it'll be cheaper to die) and a bunch of fillings. I got myself here; am hoping against hope they'll let me do the payment plans instead of all up front paying. I don't know what I'm going to do... this is just too much right now and all at once too!

Well, on other news. My computer is officially located in my bedroom. The connection isn't great but oh well; it's still okay for internet use and I don't play online games anymore so bleh.

Still stuck at the dentist

Wow...

I haven't exactly been active on here in a while; honestly I haven't been active anywhere on the web in the past couple of... days... weeks? I don't even know how long I've been bogged down. I'm trying to write the next chapter in my story only to come up against a brick wall with each idea I try writing.
But what should be a nice change is the fact that my computer will now be in my bedroom; so I cat write when I want to without having to go (get up, start computer, quiet... tap tap on the keys Mom: What are you doing again? Me: attempting smexy scene. DELETE DELETE: Nothing...

Yeah it'll be nice :)

Tomorrow is my day off, but I have a dentist visit for tomorrow.... I haven't been to the dentist in over three years; and the last time I went was to get my wisdom teeth out and two really chipped teeth pulled. I have no illusions about the state of my mouth; it's horrible.
I expect to be shamed tomorrow... last dentist told me that there was no point to treating my teeth because I was only going to continue screwing up. I... yeah, I don't like the dentist at all because of a string of really horrible ones.

Hoping tomorrow goes well, am so tired I am typing the wrong words and with probably continue that theme for the rest of this journal... blog... whatever!

Good... not good night, I have to wait for the stuff in the dryer to finish... it's my bedsheets and blanket.

Sitting in the theater waiting for HP7 to begin 27 minutes to go and my sisters haven't returned from the snack bar LOL *-*

Worst day ever

I'm sitting here in tears because today was so horrible. It was like every customer was angry and was taking it out on me. Things just kept going wrong, I kept getting yelled at, and it was all for things I had no control over.
Jesus, I have never cried at work before but I did. I burst into tears and my shitty ass manager just left me at the register crying. What a jack ass!

To finish the day... I ordered a tea from a fast food place and got a fucking diet soda... and my dad didn't want to go back to fix it. What ever... I'm so fucking sick of life right now.

Come hell or high water I'm gone by 11

Is it such a hard thing to be nice to a cashier?!

One of those days...

I'm sitting here with 30 minutes to go until I leave for work, and I'm not exactly happy. See, my mother was supposed to have been home at 1, which would have allowed me to keep a cell phone at work. She's working late = no cell phone for me.

I'm about to blow up about this since I'm the one PAYING for the damn phone and I've had it ONE DAY of last week. I'll talk to her about it some time tomorrow, since I'm working until 11:30 tonight, and have to be back in at 10:30
I'm going to change something because I cannot keep pulling shifts like this. I'm 21 yeah, but I'm tired and need sleep too. By the time I get home tonight it'll be almost twelve. I wont unwind until 1, and by the time I get to sleep it'll be going on 2am, that's if I fall asleep nicely. If not I'll not sleep at all and be a zombie the following morning for my freaking second 8 hour shift in a row.

God, I hate this job sometimes. They don't respect the cashiers both the customers and the mngmt.

Sometimes I just want to crawl up underneath a rock and tell them all to go fuck themselves something good.

3 days of Pure. Freaking. Hell.

Well, today begins three days of long shifts at work. Today is 6 and a half, tomorrow and the day after are 8 hour shifts :( I freaking HATE these shifts, my feet hurt so bad and I'm so sick of the idiots I'm forced to deal with.

Anyway, last night I about died laughing. My LEAST favorite customer came through when I was covering a break for our door greeter; he looked over, did the double take, frowned, and said something to his wife. I smiled sweetly and completely ignored him until he walked away after standing there for a minute or two.
This is the same guy who called me fat and continues to go through my line if he sees me (Even if there are two lanes with absolutely no one in them).
I didn't have to ring him up last night because of the door breaks; I was happy, life is good!

Today I'm not worried about the shift, it's my second 6 and a half hour shift this week. I just bought my tickets for the Harry Potter Midnight showing (WOOT) and am looking forward to that! I'm listening to the news talk about how the Shuttle is going to be scrubbed. It's too rainy here.

Well, I'm out of things to talk about. I'm attempting to write more of my story but am too tired due to working so much. Ugh, 7 days in a row, Ladies and gents, SEVEN DAYS WITH NO BREAKS. I'm exhausted and my paycheck sucked ass. It makes this job seem not worth it sometimes.

Why is it that when I want to sleep I find myself completely unable to do so?! Ugh, this totally sucks ;(

Fail... but honestly...

The jury did about as well as can be expected. That is all I wanted to say... I'm tired.. work tomorrow... somebody shoot me please?

Happy 4th!

I decided to cheer myself up today (long depressing story about being ditched by my sisters) by telling you all some of my funny and favorite customer stories. Some are about rotten customers and some are just funny fails by myself and co-workers (along with customers too!)

--
I had only been working at the store for a couple months when my manager called me off the register with fifteen minutes left in my shift. She asked if I would help her and my other manager collect the cash tills from the closed registers. I agreed and was told to push the cart (DON'T LET GO. TWO HANDS ALWAYS!!!) and sign into the registers when told to.
Well, we reached the other end of the store where the express-lanes are. My manager looks over and calls out to a customer that this side of the store is closed and he'll have to go down to 18 to check out.
My male Manager is standing beside me and looks over with a big grin.

Manager: We get creeps like that all the time, don't worry.

Me: *looking past him at the customer* Uh... that's actually my dad, he's waiting to drive me home ~_^

Manager: O_O... Oh, ummm, sorry?

--
It's the day before Christmas Eve and I'm on an Express-Lane about to close down (we close those registers at 9 O'clock) My final customer is a woman buying a bike and a jug of milk. I'm still new (less than one month) and I try to explain out replacement plan to her. She agrees and I ring it up onto her total. She flips out.

Customer: What the FUCK that's way more than it should be!

Me: Ummm. the plan was 20 dollars ma'am.

Customer: I'm not stupid but it should only be 218

Me: That's without tax ma'am.

Customer: Bull shit, I want to talk to your manager!

I call the manager over and after much bickering we take the replacement plan off and I ring up the bike and milk while my manager is standing there watching.

Customer: THAT'S STILL TOO MUCH GODDAMN MONEY!

Manager: The tax, ma'am.

Woman: You're charging me 8 dollars for milk?
Me: No, there's tax on the bike, ma'am.

Customer: RING THE BIKE UP ALONE!

I take the milk off.

Customer: Damn it, you're still charging me too much

At this point my manager is losing his cool.

Manager: Ma'am, there is TAX on the bike, the TAX is EIGHT DOLLARS!

The woman paid for everything and left screaming that we charged her eight dollars for milk... My manager actually gave me a hug and told me I did great :D

--
This happened yesterday and made my day so much brighter; I was dying with laughter after he left my register.

Man comes up buying milk, eggs, duck-tape and little notebooks.
Man: How are you today, missy?
Me: I'm good *ringing up his items* did you find everything alright?

Man: *leans closer, faint smell of beer* Did you know we're in the twilight zone?

Me: *pauses in scanning* Uh... *laughs* No, I didn't know that :p

Man: Yeah, they don't WANT us to know it either, it's like the matrix but only the twilight zone!

Me: Nice.... you're total...

The man slides his debit card but gets a very typical error that our store's debit does. I offer to slide the card on my side since it normally fixes the problem.

Man: No! You can't! That's how they FIND YOU!

Me: Okay, calm down! *laughing and shaking my head* Slide it again and we'll see if it works.

Man: *slides card* Oh, there we go! *enters pin and completes his order* Thank you so much, beautiful!

Me: You're welcome, have a happy 4th!

Man: *reaches out and grabs my hand* Stay safe, now that you've talked to me they'll come looking for you *Dead serious face* They'll reprogram you!

Me: That... wouldn't be good, I'll be careful!

After the man leaves my co-worker comes up beside me.

Co-worker: Did that really just happen?

Me: Welcome to walmart! :)
--
This story was told by my co-worker, I adore this girl and trust that it really happened.
 She was still new to the job, hired during the Christmas rush. They had her as a door greeter out in garden center when a couple came through.

Co-worker: Have a nice day!

Man turns and does the train eyes. He turns and whispers to his girl-friend who does the train eyes

Co-worker: O_o

Man walks over to her: Hi, how are you?

Co-worker: Good...

Man: Listen, I don't know if you'd be interested but... if you're ever curious to explore new areas of sexuality, my partner and I would be VERY interested in having you come play with us.

The woman reaches out and touches Co-worker's hand: Very interested

Co-worker: O_O *to passing male employee* H-help?

--
And at the top of the list!

I'm working the smoke house (only lane that sells smokes) when a Spanish man and his sister come through buying a couple things. I ring them up and they stand there talking with me as I'm finishing the order. The man decides he wants smokes after all and asks for the same type my mom used to smoke, I go and get them and ringing them up.
The man is shocked I knew the brand since most people don't care for them. He looks me up and down with a big grin on his face (Note that at this point there is a small line)

Man: Have any kids?

Me: Nope, just nieces and nephews!

Man: Married?
Me: Not yet, no.

Man: Do you wanna be?

Me: O_O Uh... *laughs* what?

Man's sister: ~_~ *grabs his arm* I'm so sorry! *Pulls him away* I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU JUST DID THAT!

Next customer: Uh, well, I guess it's true.

Me: What?

Customer: You CAN get anything at Walmart!

Hanging on by a thread

I decided not to give two weeks notice just yet. I'm applying like crazy (need to go grab an application from the movie theater), but taking a break tonight because it's a long shift at work. I have two days off tomorrow in-which I'm going to apply at a couple more local stores.
It may sound crazy to most people; but I don't mind the cashier work, I just hate the store I work for. I don't like the company, I don't like any of it right now. It's all too much corp bullshit for my taste.

The guy who called me fat the other night? He came back last night, I think he's stalking me now as he jumped straight into my line when he saw me... dude, really? You're like 50... leave a 21 year old woman alone ;( grrrrr

Thinking of leaving

I'll give it tonight to see if I'm going to stay at this job. I've been driven about as far up a tree as I can go; and nothing seems to be changing. At least if I leave on good terms I can be rehired, so I guess if I still have issues tonight I'll be giving 2 weeks notice tomorrow.
Part of me is scared but another part just wants this bull shit to end. I'm fine with job hunting again for a better fit; I just don't think I can continue to work for walmart when the customers and mngt treat their employees like shit.

Well, we'll see how tonight goes whether I'm leaving tomorrow or not.

Worst customer of the year goes to:

The random Jack wagon that came through last night. Okay, I know I am not skinny, but I'm proud to say I have LOST ten pounds since my last doctor's visit. This jackass comes through last night, first thing out of his mouth "Been drinking a lot of beer lately, or are you pregnant?"
I was absolutely speechless. My mouth dropped open and I could only stare at him before looking away and mumbling "No," and trying to hold my temper as I rung up his order.
He was a complete dick through the whole thing, but tried to wish me a goodnight when he was leaving. I think he got the picture when I threw his bag into his cart (he couldn't load his own bags either). I didn't speak to him after saying No. I didn't look at him, didn't do anything for fear I was going to go the fuck off on him and lose my job. Screaming at a paying customer in the middle of Walmart might look pretty damn bad.
I get a fucking shit load of brownie points for playing nice. I AM NOT a nice person, and I swear if I see him again you'll be seeing my post after getting fired for walking away from the register. I'll do it, too; I swear to God I will walk away next time someone pulls that bullshit card on me.
He had no reason to be cruel to me, I did nothing wrong to him for him to act that way toward me.
I already have enough self image problems without doubting myself even more. I know I'm losing weight but what he said was like dropping a huge rock on me. I already paid my due with an eating disorder... People like him make me remember why I had problems before; because to be perfect in this world you have to be skinny... or at least that's what my demons whisper to me after nights like last.
I'm so fucking tired of this place. I'm tired that the managers don't stand up for the cashiers, that we constantly have to deal with bullshit people day in and day out... I don't think I'm going to last there much longer. I'm just so tired of people.
I just don't know what to do anymore.

Seeing Transformers :) happy happy, but boy do I have a story for you later!

YAY!

I'm happy, I'm going to see the Transformers 3 movie with my sister tonight at midnight :p it's been a while since I did a midnight showing and I am honestly thrilled to be going.
I didn't expect to go to it, but got her to agree to drive me (paying for her ticket helped too) so all is well that ends well!

^_^

Ready, steady, go!

Another day, another dollar. I work once again (6 days in a row before my break) and I'm sitting here listening to the afternoon storms rolling in. It seems like they pick just before I leave for work to come storming in. I got lucky yesterday in that the rain waited until after the storm had rolled over my work to start coming down in buckets.

I'll be leaving soon just to give myself time to buy a five hour engery shot and maybe a pack of smokes... (I'm trying to quit, really I am... it's just this job drives me crazy and... I know, I know). The smoking thing is driving me nuts because I know how much my mom hates it. She quit after 30 years of smoking and here I am...

Anyway, on another note. I need to watch Hills have eyes again, I think I've turned my characters into a bunch of sissy boys. At least watching the movie will get be back to where I want to be with the plotting. I'll watch the original and then the remake :)

I also bought Splice (loved it) and The last house on the left. I didn't realize that LHOTL was the original (damn them for remodelling the case) but I figure I might as well watch it :p

Almost time for me to flee, so I better make sure my dad's awake to take me. Tomorrow is my long shift (again) with 10:30am to 7pm (HATE that shift) I also have to do my shopping after work so I'm sticking around until my ma gets off at 9(not fun)

Well, off I go! :) which me luck and hope I don't murder my customers! or quit.

I lol at that given my last blog. But all is well in work world.

Ugh why do I have to work so much? My feet are killing me!!!

Nervous?

I'm sitting here feeling very unsure. I saw one of the managers gesturing at me last night while talking with my CSM. Now when I went to check my third week work shift; I don't have one. I checked mom's to see if maybe it was a company thing but it's not; she has hers and I don't.
Maybe I'm just reading into this too much. But I'm scared they're going to fire me. I don't know what I did wrong but I don't think I can handle being fired... I'll burst into tears and be a total wreck... All this after I thought about quitting time out of mind.

Oh well, what happens happens. I can't do anything to change it if they fire me.

My guilty pleasure: buying cute sleepwear even tho I have no one to share it with.

Family Tree - Eden

Well, I promised on FFN that I would post the Family Tree of my Yuma Flats family :)

--
Michael Grace and Susan Lewis -
Samuel, Edith and Leeann

Samuel and Edith -
Haven (First child, died shortly after birth), Hades, Neptune, James and Jupiter, Juno, Cyst, Bryon and Kathrin.

Jupiter and Juno –
Goggle and Mars

Hades and Juno -
Pluto

Neptune and Juno -
Lizard and Ruby

James and Juno -
Erik

James and Kim –
Alexis

Neptune and Kathrin –
Sol, Lukas, Mathew, Jon, Mark, Kyle, Lisa, Merry, Edith.

Hades and Leeann -
Quinn, Soul, Demon, Zero and Van.

Sol and Levi –
David, Damon, Silvia, Sky, Loki

-- That’s all thus far--

Interesting customers and nightly news

You know, I meant to write about this right after it happened but I just started the rewrite on Eden and am so thrilled with that that everything else simply slipped my mind :)
This happened last week and was probably the creepiest moment in all of my cashiering life thus far. It was a slow night because of the rain and I was on a belt along with two other cashiers (one girl and one guy) we were joking around when two customers chose my lane and I signed in to ring them out.
Both of them are wearing skinning t-shirts (the type hunters wear or whatever) and buying some of the weirdest items I've ever seen (Bleach, towels, skinning knife, big black trash-bags, hangers, and bullets). I didn't think much about the items until I finished ringing them up and the couple stood there in a daze chatting with me as I tried to get the guy to pay for the order and leave me alone. The conversation had the cashiers' around me standing there with their mouths hanging open.
Male Customer: Your skin, it's so beautiful.
Female: Oh, so pale, how did you get it so pale?
Me: Uh... I'm Irish.
Female: Irish and what?
Me: Scot
Male: Isn't that the same thing?
Me: Don't tell a scot that. :D
Female: *Looks at male* That's the type of skin I want
Male: :) I told you we'd get it
Me: Uh... your total is... um... on... the screen. *Getting nervous*
Female: But she is perfect! *pointing at me* What time do you get off work.
Me: *Lying* 2am
Male: *Looks at female* fine.. later... *pays for the order* It was a pleasure doing business with you! :D
Me: Same... have a goodnight
Female: See you later Ms. Irish!

I was so fucking freaked by them that I made my dad come into the store to get me when it finally came time for me to leave. I kept thinking "OMG, these freaks are going to kidnap me and do horrible, horrible things to me!"
I'm still wondering exactly what the hell that was all about. But I haven't seen them since and hopefully never will again!

So, at the moment I'm enjoying my day off, getting ready to write Chapter three of Eden (I'm doing short chapters because they're easier to handle with my random, messed up life) and making a German Chocolate Cake :) But while I was really looking forward to it earlier that kind of changed after I took some Emergen-C (a cold med that is supposed to help you fight a cold) I don't think I'm sick right now but I've been feeling a little worn down so it can't help to take it and hope for the best, yeah?

Anyway, I'll post chapters 1-2 on here for Eden later :)
Nighty night

Father's Day

Well, Father's day is tomorrow and it always leaves me facepalming because I can't help feeling like it sneaks up on me. I work at Walmart so I know this isn't true, I've known about it for weeks (hello, the cards were put out right after Mother's day) I guess the real issue is the big difference between Mom and Dad.
For me, my mom has always been there for me through thick and thin. She's totally my favorite parent and I'm glad she's my mom. Dad on the other hand never felt like more of a dad to me... he was always coaching soccer teams and things of that nature when I was growing up. I hated sports with a passion so Dad and I never saw eye to eye; plus he always made me feel like I was a bit of a let down.
When I started writing I was happy I could do something that nobody else around me could. I thrilled that I could create these stories, craft them into readable works, and just enjoy something that I worked my ass off to create. Dad never saw it like that. To him it was always a waste of time.

So father's day has never had as much meaning for me as Mother's day. I'll get him a card when I go to work tonight but... honestly I'm just not that excited about it. I work all day tomorrow so I wont see him until the evening anyway... :(
I'm a bit depressed now... I think I'm going to go and find something to make me laugh/smile. I'm hooked on Unfriendable :)

Work updates

Been a while since I actually wrote something interesting... I know. I'm doing my best to balance out an ever changing life with one that wants to stand completely still. I don't like change, it scares me far too much but my life is changing and I just have to adjust to it.
During this period of adjustment my muse runs and hides beneath the bed and doesn't come out for weeks. When this phase passes I'm sure he'll come back with a new story :)  (yes, I think of my muse as a he).
I'm also dealing with moral issues toward some of the subject matter my muse wants me to write... I'll have to think it over very carefully before I actually write these stories out because they are very morally wrong by normal standards.

ANYWAY...

I picked up four extra hours at work tomorrow, I'll be going in at 3 instead of 7, and during those four hours I'll be working out on the floor (YAY!) I'm a bit freaked because I've never worked the floor before but I'm willing to do my best so whatever :D

I'll try and get you some more updates on DA and here... hopefully everything works out alright.

:)

Well, a shower certainly made me feel a little better, plus I did my hair in a cute style, stole my sister's shoes (I love them) and found a pair of work pants that I didn't know I had, they're cute and comfy which is delightful!!!!
On the whole this is not a bad monday :) I figure I'll curl up with my book for a bit and then off to work I go :D

Yes, I am feel a ton better about tonight, I guess changing your POV really does help. I still don't love this job, it is stressful and mostly a pain in the ass but I will do my best.

Needing a little R&R

Never again will I give up my day off to work, Jezz I am tired of that place! I mean, the money will be worth it (or at least that's what I'm telling myself) but I am just so exhausted right now it's not funny. Tonight's shift is 6 and a half hours long and I should be done by 11pm. Yay for that! (I don't mind later shifts to be perfectly honest with you. Tomorrow is a 4 and a half, I have two of those in a row and then one four hour shift before my next break.

But, at the very least, my manager took note and thanked me yesterday, which was surprising and delightful all at the same time :D
Happy happy joy joy!

Okay, going to go watch movies now! :) I have a game review to write as well!

New Story! :D

I'm still working on Angels fall, but I have a feeling that that story will take me some time to complete, maybe years (before I like it anyway) so in order to keep my spirits up I'm writing a story that will be posted on DA and Fictionpress at some point in the future. The idea behind it is simple: What would happen if one day you wake up to find yourself in the role of a fairytale princess? This is exactly what happens to Alice, a normal young woman who finds herself in the shoes of Snow White.
She wakes to find herself not only to find herself in SW's shoes but discovers that the story has gone horribly off track. The King and Queen are dead and the Evil Queen has taken the Huntsman as her husband while using a spirit named Mirror to spy on the rest of the kingdom.
Alice is cursed and unable to tell anyone who she really is, though Mirror knows she is not the proper Princess... and the whole story is just a blast to write! I am thrilled beyond belief with it lol

I'm sitting here hoping my mother arrives home in time for me to make it to work; I will be furious if she is not because she KNEW damn well what time I had to go in today...oh well, no use stressing over it. I'm just going to go with the flow and hope for the best! :)

Well, best get the rest of me ready; though with how tired I am... yeah... anyway. OH! I saw Super 8 last night with my sister (<--the reason I'm tired) it was a pretty good movie I must say, not my usual type but good nonetheless.

^_^ heh

Well, today was supposed to be my day off but I ended up picking up a six hour shift for tonight. I arrived at work last night and my manager asked me if I would be willing to take this shift since the cashier who was supposed to have it had other plans.
I need money so it'll mean a better pay check in the long run. Of course it also means I'll be going 9 days straight with no breaks :( That's one thing that sucks about it.

Well, hoping to get some writing done but I went to a late movie last night and now I feel exhausted. I'll probably shower and just relax before I have to be at work. :D

Another working day to go then my first saturday off in weeks!! Hoping to get some serious writing done :)

At the mall with my sister, hopefully going to shop, she is getting her hair cut. Apparently a pregnant womans hair grows insanely fast lol :-)

Good morning... where's my coffee?

I think the worst thing about living in a house with a bunch of people is when I get up in the morning and the coffee pot is empty. I am NOT a morning person by any stretch of the imagination. I exist, that's about all I can mange during the first few hours of the day; and that's with a couple cups of sugar and creamed to hell coffee. I end up staring at the pot of a couple seconds before letting a few curses slip out from under my breath.
I add another scoop of coffee to the maker and then the water, stand there for however long it takes to get enough for one cup and... *sigh* I begin to feel alive after that first sip.

Last night (as you saw with my cellphone posts) I worked a later shift that usual for me... okay, so lately it hasn't been that unusual and in fact my entire next week is chop full of till 11 shifts *that's where I begin cursing like a sailor* but I was so hyped up from work that I didn't get myself into bed until after 1am. I was supposed to go with my sister to get her hair cut (she needed a babysitter for her 2yr old) but when my mom mentioned going out to breakfast as well; I just pulled the covers up over my head and told them no...

Five minutes after they left however and I was in the shower trying to make my hair look presentable. Something about the workplace has been turning my hair into an oily mess; usually I wash it every other day and it looks fine... lately however I need to wash it EVERY NIGHT to keep it nice looking. I guess I need to look into a new shampoo or something.
Again, I have pictures I'm drawing of the Angels fall crew, I will have to post them later... I have over eight of them now I think, most colored (horrible). I don't like to call myself an artist because there are a thousand better than myself. These pictures are just for shits and giggles on my half, seeing how I imagine the characters, and it gives me a grasp of the colors of their skin and hair. Those I'm in the process of coloring Exile and had a heart-attack when I realized he was purple... the story him has black skin with purple highlights but I can't color skin black without it looking like shit, so I did it backwards, purple with black highlights :)

Okay, coffee is finally kicking in and I think I'll check DA and FB before tuning into the Casey Anthony case (<---FL thing, mother murdered her 2yr and is standing trail for it. Can't turn on the news without seeing it everywhere. Look it up, it is an insane case.)

Ps. My new saying is this: and I'm off like a herd of turtles. I dont know why I find that funny but I do :-) Off to clock in to hell... I mean work.

Another work day begins with the typical traffic jam LOL. 4 and a half hours on my feet tonight. I have a love/hate with these shifts.

Angels Fall - Character Bio - Kay

Told you I'd post another one lol. This one is for my Hearth Spirit, Kay (Name subject to change) I think Kay has had ever name possible thus far but this one is sticking... maybe.

--
Kay - Lady of the Hearth.
Kay and Silvana were born just two years apart and could not have been more different. Silvana held grace and beauty befitting a nature spirit, while Kay arrived with a ruddy and more homely look; suiting her role as a Hearth spirit.
Whereas Silvana was thrilled to marry Silas, Kay found herself reluctantly engaged and married to Aden the fire Lord. She did not agree with his love of war and his lack of understanding of home life drove her insane. They clashed from day one but somehow managed to make it work. All four of them were assigned to Earth at the same time, much to the sisters' delight.
Kay found earth to be a beautiful place and threw herself into any and all tasks given to her. When Kieran turned from the Maker, Kay did her best to handle the loss of some of her best friends to his darkness. She mourned them deeply and hated the fact that Aden was unable to understand her loss.
It was during that period of loss that she began spending many hours in the library of Master Vayu, the Master of wind.  Vayu was everything that Aden was not; he was kind and thoughtful, insisting that she take her tea with him in his study - and allowing her to remain there when she decided that the fire in his study was the best in all the tower.
What Kay failed to realize, seeing as she tought of Vayu as a much older man, was that the wind spirit was beginning to fall for her. His love of her was not lost on Silvana who would become the piece of puzzle that connect the two.

--
As I said in my last character bio - Nen is the embodiment of a cheating husband. Kay is the cheating wife in this story. As much as I love Kay, she is one of my favorite characters, I hate what she does to Aden. Here is a man that is trying to show her how much he loves her and she just keeps seeing the negative parts of their relationship.
Vayu is also a difficult character for me to like, while he is charming and absolutely yummy... he come off as a slimeball inside my head. I wont ever agree with cheating on your partner, nope, but Vayu is the type of man that makes it seem okay; even going as far as to try and make Kay his wife after... certain things happen in storyland.

Well, I'll stop now before I give too much away... actually, you know what... :) Let me post a snip of story for you! <--At this time I have no readers so I feel like I'm talking to myself lol

--
Angels Fall - Kay and Vayu meeting - Chapter 1 Draft -

Kay stretched her legs out and tilted her head back, the ends of her red hair falling into the water, which rippled. “I don’t know.” She admitted. “I just don’t feel like it is the right time, that’s all.”

“Or perhaps it is that Aden is not the right man?” Silvana said slyly. “I see the looks that Master Vayu gives when you two are walking together in the morning.”

“Master Vayu is a dear friend,” Kay chided, “I am loyal to Aden and you better damn well respect that, sister.”

“Calm yourself, I only speak jokingly with you.” Silvana patted Kay’s arm as she rose to her feet. “But I do say that you protest too much when it comes to our wind lord.”

Kay watched as Silvana walked away, vanishing behind some of the overgrown rosebushes. She leaned forward and rested her hands on her knees, staring off into the distance until she became aware of another’s presence within the garden. She looked up at the tall wind spirit and Keeper of lore within the Tower Proper.

Vayu was well respected by all; perhaps it was not so much of a surprise that Kay had begun to grow fond of him. She was a hearth spirit, a creature of comfort and care. She loved Vayu’s vast library and warm fires. She loved to curl up in the oversized chairs and read for hours on end. It seemed to her that Vayu did not mind the company. He was one of the elder spirits of their order; his mate had returned to the Maker’s side long before Kay had been placed on this world. She liked to think that her presence was welcome at his side; far more than it had been at Aden’s during the past few months.

Aden was the Fire Lord, a fierce man who never did things half asked. If he set his mind on something it would be his main focus until the task was done. At the moment he was focused at finding Kieran’s base of operations. The Void Lord had taken some of Aden’s most prized objects and destroyed them, that was not something a Lord of Fire easily forgave or forgot.

Vayu was kind to her; he treated her with respect and asked her opinion on the little matters that she was best equipped to deal with. As she gazed up at him she couldn’t help but think on her sister’s words. Vayu would be an amazing father, he would be kind and wise; raising a child who didn’t rush headlong into trouble but thought his way through things. She reached her hand out to him and smiled. “Sit with me a moment, Vayu, I miss your company.”

“And my company misses you, dear.” Vayu lowered himself down beside her and smiled. “What have you been doing out here all day, dear one?” he wondered.

“My sister called me out to speak with her,” Kay explained, barely containing the excitement from her voice. “You must keep this a secret, which I know you will. Silvana’s expecting!” she burst into giggles, leaning against him as she gazed happily up at the sky. “I am almost jealous with how blessed she is.”

“Does Lord Aden not desire children?” Vayu wondered.

Kay pushed herself away from him and sighed sadly. “It’s not that… Aden would try for a child if I asked…” she looked down at her hands. “But…”

“But…”

“But I wonder what sort of father Aden would be to a child.” Kay said in a rush. She looked up at Vayu and let her doubts show on her face. “I don’t want a child who will rush into trouble without thought, I don’t want to mourn my child’s death because he or she was too much like Aden!”

Vayu cupped her face in his hands and whispered soothingly to her. “Calm yourself there is no need to over react like this. Aden is a good man, he may not always be wise but he would not teach such habits to his child. I am sure he feels the same as you do about having a wise child.”

“Vayu, you give that man too much credit. Aden cares about warfare and battles. He does not care for nor understand matters of the home like I do…” she didn’t add that she thought Vayu understood them far more than her idiot of a husband.

Vayu cocked his head to the side. “Why tell me this?” he wondered, sounding saddened. “You tempt me far too much with these words of yours.”

Angels Fall - Character Bio: Nen

My inability to sleep strikes again. It's going on midnight and I can't bring myself to go to bet just yet... I figure I'll give you a character bio from Angels Fall.

Nen - Lord of the Water & Rea - River Spirit
Twins Nen and Rea were the best of friends growing up. No one was more surprised than they were when the Maker ordered them down to the newling planet Earth.
This was the first time that Rea had ever seen Cyrus, the Earth lord, and she was instantly in love with him. Nen didn't think the relationship was right given the age gap between Rea and Cyrus, when his sister asked for his blessing over her marriage to Cyrus he denied it and did not attend the ceromny. 
This broke Rea's heart and she never truly forgave her brother for it. Rea and Cyrus soon proved to be a wonderful match, with Rea always making him happy even after his best friend Kieran turned away from the Maker. 
But Kieran was not blind to Cyrus' love of Rea and how important the female was to him. He used Exile, one of Rea's old friends, to lure her away from the Tower Proper where she was later killed and her body put on display outside the tower. 
Nen was devistated by the loss of his twin, he never forgave Cyrus for failing to protect the girl and he saw the earth lord as the cause of her death (if they had not been a couple than Rea would never have been a target in the first place). 

Nen forced himself to continue on with his life. Lady Sevan, was sent to replace Rea's role as water spirit, after first she and Nen clashed horrible but soon Nen found himself falling in love with the female. They were wed and soon had a child together - Yuki. Yuki came as something of a surprise to the two water elements because she was not a water spirit herself but a Winter spirit.
Nen and Sevan began to grow apart after Yuki's birth with Sevan throwing herself into her role of mother and forgetting to be a wife as well. Nen accepted this and withdrew from her as well. It wasn't until he found a baby human that things turned from bad to worse...

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Now if I go any further I'll spoil the story lol. Nen is adorable but I can't help feeling bad for him. He is the embodiment of a cheating husband trying to decide if it's right or wrong to go after something when one is being neglected in their marriage... Sevan is not a favorite of mine... not at all. 

Yuki is an interesting character and I'll post a bio for her later on. Next up will be Kay (name subject to change, I've changed it twice already!)

 

Testing the phone text thingy ;) that way I can blog from work!!! Hahaha... Yeah no. ;p

Welcome!

I decided to do this since so much of my DA account journal is me complaining about personal issues... silly as it may sound I feel like I can vent a little more over here than I can on there. This is also the space I will be using to post new or WIP stories and chapters that I feel DA is too hard on (PWP, Smexy stuff etc...)

While I'm here I guess I'll do a little intro about myself. My name is Sarah but I go by Elisa more often on the internet than I do my first name (Elisa is short for Elisabeth which is my middle name, I played soccer with a bunch of girls' named Sarah so my coach decided I was Elisa). I'm 21, almost 22, years old and I live in the Sunshine state (Florida). I wasn't born here but so much of my life was spent in the swamp that I think of it as my birth state.

I used to babysit for a living; which drove me up a wall mind you, and then I got hired on as a cashier at Walmart. It's a good place to work if you're just getting started (which I was). I never held any respect for the job as a whole until I found myself doing it. :)
If you ever stop in a certain walmart and see me, say hi! lol, though I admit that I think the big-wigs might have a couple issues with my and my writing but whatever; this is my personal life - as long as I show up on time and work my shift I don't think they should be complaining :p

 My WIP stories at the moment are -
Flames of tomorrow - Rewrite.
Unnamed Alice in wonderland story.

Angel's Fall - Original story that has taken all my focus off my other projects. You'll be seeing a lot about that in the coming blogs. I'm in love with it really, the characters are AMAZING! :) and I'm not tooting my own horn, these guys jumped up and said "HEY, HEY! YOU, WRITER LADY, OUR STORY NOW DAMN IT!" and I bowed down and began writing about their story.

Well, there you go, my intro post to break the vigin blog. Please keep tuned for further updates and all that wonderful jazz.

Elisa.